Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize