using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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