Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
There's even glitter on my cock...
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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