So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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