i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
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