mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Yo dont text me then not text me
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize
