I hate all girls vehemently.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Randomize
