is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You took a bar mat shot.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
