question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
that's an acceptable place to lick
well you can't waste a boner
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
