you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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