My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
