And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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