I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
