Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
