You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Randomize
