Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
