Please, let me fuck your mom
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
