Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
