im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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