what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
