Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
