my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
