were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
