ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
