There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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