What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
