12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
