YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
