Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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