id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
