Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
