dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
