Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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