She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
third nipple confirmed
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Randomize