I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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