Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
