so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
