If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
