i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
