i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
