What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
