I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
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