whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I just pynch a tree in the face
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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