She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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