I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
