All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
