Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
