You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
