I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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