I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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